I have a map... I just don't know where I am.

Frankly, not only do I not know where I need to go right now, but I don't even know which way is North.  I've been doing the online applications thing of late, but I don't even know what I'll do when I find a job.  

I feel like a round peg.

The "normal" 9 to 5 work week is a square hole.

College is an triangular hole.

I don't fit in either, but what is a round peg to do?  I have to fit in somewhere, but all the things that I really enjoy doing seem to leave me with the idea of putting starving artist or hobo on my next W-2.

The good news is I've finally actually sat down to write a book.  It is idea 12 of 139.4.  It seemed like the easiest one to flesh out though, and I am a semi-expert on the topic, so this may work.  Or maybe not.  It is hard to say at this point.  All I have thus far is a massive outline and about 5 pages from the first section.  It is in severe need of editing, but it is out on my laptop.  It's a start.

Small steps...

Oh, and more good news!  My fiancee now has a blog, so go by and visit some time.  I think it's awesome, but then again I'm kinda biased. :P

What do you do with a BA in English... or Communication for that matter?

First off, props to Avenue Q.  It has some great songs. 

Secondly, I bare news.  I have decided to stop putting off the inevitable and go try to do something with my life and my talents.  (Limited though they are.)  So, I guess I may never know what one does with a B.A. because I'm opting out of the process in favor of doing something that I love.  Once I actually figure out a plausible way to make money from sketching, writing and acting as an unofficial tour guide...

The best part of the whole thing is the role reversal though.  For the last year or more I've been asking myself what the **** I was doing in a hyper structured system while the family told me how wonderful it was that I had submitted myself to that system.  Now the family is asking me what on earth I'm thinking to leave the well paved path, but I'm practically (and sometimes literally) jumping for joy to be able to move in the direction of my dreams.  

It's not much but it's a start.  And as my fiancee reminded me as I pulled out of Berry's parking lot, "A journey of a thousand miles begins with a single step." (Lao Tzo)  This is my first step.  I'm scared to death, and excited beyond reason.  This is going to be one hell of a journey.

What if.

What if I'm not meant to follow the "normal" path

What if I go another way

What if for once I get brave

What if I find a new game to play

What if it doesn't matter

If your right and I am wrong

What if it is time to move on

And write my own life's song

What if I succeed 

What if I fail

What if....

"Sometimes I worry about being a success in a mediocre world." -Lily Tomlin

Step 1: Remove alternative routes

I put myself in a position where I will have to find a better job and consider housing alternatives for next year in the near future.  It is time for me to move forward.  I will do things that make a difference.  

I will write the words the world reads.

Assume Survival Float

When floating in water for extended periods of time, it is important to remember the correct methodology for a survival float.  The survival float allows one to stay afloat for periods of time that would not be possible using other methods.

You may sink below the surface at times, but so long as you don't panic you will be okay.

It may seem like it is taking forever for help to arrive, but it is important to remain calm and continue floating.

Make sure to keep filling up your lungs all the way.

Relax.  Breath deep and don't panic.  Only 6 weeks left... then land and rest.